I’ve entered a new dimension where I feel like a million life-altering things have happened but I can’t remember any of it and I think it’s still 2004 and somewhere along the way I was riding a unicorn. It all seems like a bad – yet oddly comforting – dream. Or perhaps I’m just hallucinating […]


I’m kinda sick of my almost-12-year-old kid having all these old people problems: cancer, hearing aids, balding and now pneumonia. I’m waiting for dementia and Alzheimer’s to set in, too, and perhaps a side of gout. Why not turn up the fun to eleven? If you get that reference, well, you rock. Seriously, though. I’m […]

Bad Mood Mom

I’m focusing on the wrong things right now. I thinking about a “friend” who let me down – this cancer business was just too much for her so she “gracefully” bowed out of my life. I’m thinking about another person who doesn’t want to subject her children to my son because she doesn’t think they […]


Happy Father’s Day to all the good dads out there. Hope you got a burnt waffle in bed, or a macaroni portrait, or a coupon book with certificates “good for…” something you’ll never redeem because you want to keep it forever. In the third grade, I was running top speed from a boy who was […]

Off at camp…

Since learning of Ben’s relapse three weeks ago, it’s been a whirlwind of activity. Surgery. End of school. Chemo. Throwing up. Trips to the hospital. Co-pays. Learning just how bad Matt’s new insurance coverage is. Home nurses reminding us how to administer IV fluids and slow pushes of benadryl. And, of course, the incessant worry. […]


Ben was diagnosed with Stage IV Neuroblastoma when he was 2 1/2. Most kids that age are working on their vocabulary and honing in on those fine motor skills; running, jumping, wreaking havoc, etc. My Ben was not eating, battling chronic fevers, and occasionally limping and collapsing because cancer had eaten multiple holes through his […]

Case #122502

So, the night before Ben’s surgery I couldn’t sleep. I made a bunch of cinnamon muffins and took them to Ben’s school as soon as they opened just to have something to keep myself occupied. It’s such an odd feeling to look forward to and dread something all at the same time. Of course I […]