I used to be able to sleep anywhere. I could sleep on a hardwood floor, in the middle of the woods without a tent, or even with my feet stapled to the ceiling. I considered it to be one of my special skills. In recent years, however, I’ve lost my ability to catch Zzzz’s just [...]
Yes, it’s Carnival Day. But seeing how I have a strong aversion to rides that are assembled in a single afternoon and my consistent inability to win anything on the Midway by ringing canes, toppling milk bottles, or drawing the “lucky duck” out of the water of the “who knows where THAT’S been” water trough, [...]
I checked my many resources on holidays and all of them agree that today is International Dog Biscuit Appreciation Day. If this is all I get to work with I guess I’ll come up with something. Besides, I’m bored. Ben and I are just sitting here in the lobby at Children’s Hospital waiting to be [...]
“Oh Lord it’s hard to be humble when you’re perfect in every way. I can’t wait to look in the mirror ‘cuz I get better lookin each day. To know me is to love me, I must be a hell of a man. Oh Lord it’s hard to be humble but I’m doin the best [...]
Seriously. Where would we be without batteries? Batteries make the world go ’round… at least until they wear out. My batteries need a recharge. Unfortunately, rechargeable batteries were not available when I was born, so I’m stuck with having to replace them every so often. Mine are currently all corroded and stuck together, acid dripping [...]
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